Sick Day

Get thee to a fainting couch

Masks aren’t just for pandemics

Big thanks to the woman at the Madison Street Safeway Pharmacy last Saturday who wasn’t wearing a mask while coughing up a lung. I was there to get my second COVID vaccination for the year and another for pneumonia (good for a lifetime, one and done) — which I didn’t even know they had! — and my worst fear was a strong reaction to having two shots at once.

Fast forward to this morning and I still feel like crap. The phlegm portion of our proceedings has now begun. Hot dog! And my arm has a bright red spot the size of a quarter to remind me of my cheery pharmacist who gives painless injections and loves being a pharmacist. I enjoy that. People should like their jobs.

So, my ribs are sore from coughing, I’ve worked through half of a bonus bag of Hall’s Honey Lemon lozenges and I fear the boyfriend may have been infected.

Time for a sick day.

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Currently ensconced at Howard’s End

Since Sunday I have been absorbed with all things Merchant/Ivory and E.M. Forster. TCM is currently paying tribute to the Merchant/Ivory film production team, which I have admired since the mega-hit “A Room With a View” (1985) starring the luscious Helena Bonham-Carter and equally yummy Julian Sands (RIP). The Dames — Judy Densch and Maggie Smith — give brilliant performances along with Daniel Day-Lewis and…well come on, everyone in the film is perfectly cast.

My secret crush was on Simon Callow who played the sympathetic vicar. Callow, of course, is gay, which broke my heart at the time because I thought if I couldn’t see gay on the screen, how the hell was I going to recognize it in real life? This dilemma pretty much predicted my dating life for many years until I realized, in the words of Sir Laurence Olivier, “It’s acting, dear boy.”

I started with the documentary, “Merchant Ivory,” which traces the partnership that grew into a family of creatives and survived thirty plus years of movie-making. Most interesting surprise: Director James Ivory was raised in Klamath Falls, Oregon! I love a Pacific Northwest connection. And special shout-out to the incredible writer Ruth Prawer-Jhabvala who wrote those amazing screenplays (along with her own novels and stories).

Then, I jumped in to watch a few of their, shall we say, lesser-known films. Surprisingly, there are several, including two that I turned off within minutes: “Slaves of New York” based on the Tama Janowitz stories about Bohemian artists in 1980s New York City and “The Wild Party,” which tried to be a musical, comedy, and drama and turned into a drab mish-mash. Even Raquel Welch in 1930s wardrobe and hair is hard to watch.

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“Maurice” as a milestone

The weekend’s highlight was discovering “Maurice” (pronounced Morris), a milestone in gay cinema that still earns James Ivory heaps of gratitude from men of all ages who tell him how the film changed their lives.

It’s an autobiographical novel written by Forster in 1914, but he refused to publish it until after his death in 1970. British law criminalized homosexuality until 1967 (although not completely until 2003), a particularly cruel practice considering how they packed their boys away to private school for years and expected them to fight against their own natural instincts.

“Maurice” is a beautiful movie, especially touching when you know about Merchant and Ivory’s complicated personal relationship AND the mixed-class gay couple who inspired Forster’s story. James Ivory, at age 89, became the oldest recipient of an Academy Award for his adapted screenplay of another gay-themed novel “Call Me By Your Name” in 2018.

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What’s the big deal?

So, as I was feeling poorly and needed distraction, I decided to figure out what the big deal is about this E.M. Forster fellow. Merchant/Ivory’s greatest successes came from Forster’s novels, so what was it about this guy? I loaded my Kindle (.49 cents on Amazon!) and my Audible app and got to work.

First, I re-watched “Howard’s End,” but NOT the 1992 movie because it airs on TCM this Thursday. Instead, I dove into the 4-hour Starz version with Matthew Macfadyen and Hayley Atwell in the leads. I had watched it once before, but apparently I never finished because the final episode had me clutching my comforter to find out how it ends.

Next, I found a 15-year-old discussion on You Tube with two professors from Duke University and I was in my happy place. Dissecting the themes and characters of good literature is so satisfying— it’s like being a band nerd but with books.

I’ve been reading the novel ever since — it’s the only thing that keeps my incessant coughing from driving me mad — and I feel like I’m floating on a punt on the Thames on a warm spring day, bundled in a comforter, sipping English tea.

Forster’s examination of the effects of wealth in “Howard’s End” shares a lot with Fitzgerald’s “The Great Gatsby.” Both feature “careless” people and the un-scalable divide between classes. “Howard’s End” was published in 1910 and Gatsby in 1925 and automobiles, jealousy, and aspiration are woven throughout both novels. Forster’s words feel like the reader is being led by a sardonic tour guide while Fitzgerald’s approach is more pugilistic. Both are wonderful.

I could go on and on about the book and its themes — including the encroachment of industry and machinery on London and the conflict between creatives and capitalists — but I’ve said plenty and I need to get back to bed.

Enjoy!

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For next time

On your next sick day, I hope you have something enjoyable to to help you pass the time, preferably an obsession that takes your mind far far away from germs and vaccines. Personally, I like movies:

1. My Man Godfrey (1936)

2. The Philadelphia Story (1940) and its musical counterpart “High Society” (1956)

3. Breakfast at Tiffany’s (1961)

4. The Women (1939)

5. Funny Girl (1968)

As for books, I am ready to jump in to “Skating Shoes” by Noel Streatfeild. (See “Never Too Late” for details.

Staples to have on hand: ginger-peach tea, tissues, honey lemon throat drops, Day Quil, NyQuil, and a stuffie.

Get Well Soon!

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